Broken.... finally

sigh.... "u'll never know what u have till it's gone" this is a quote that has been reminding of the slight pain of a memory i have now.... not to mention the countless songs that sings about love torn apart....i'll have to admit that i'm a bit if not alot of a saddist... i kinda like the intense of feeling apart from the one u love... yet... it's so painful and most, many a time u wish that person wat jus here with you..... i need someone to love.... maybe then i won't feel so lonely.... yet the process of knowing someone n letting them know u n then deciding if u should get together a not... seems..so... LONG... u know like forever... i'm like so tired of having to go thur that initial stage over and over and over again.... maybe that's why to a certain degree i much prefer arrange marriages.... so fast n easy... MARRIGE first then fall in LOVE.... sigh... committement bound... learn to love each other thru it all...